Festivals - Advice & Etiquette

All very useful stuff (if you're going to a music festival). Researched and written up by my good self, with input from a handful of other festy fans. I'm reproducing it here, so when I go off to the Isle Of Wight / Reading / Latitude / whatever, I don't have to bother hunting all the info down again...

Words - Suzy Sims
Previously published on Native.tv http://www.native.tv in May 2007
(c) Niche News & Publishing Ltd

FESTIVALS - ADVICE & ETIQUETTE

Festivals bring out some odd behaviour in some people. Exposure to sun, loud music, plastic tumblers of expensive beer and a mix of swirling dust and sticky mud can make even the sanest of friends behave crazily, whether you’re festival virgins or, er, old music tarts.

Take:

Festival Ticket, Car Parking Pass – or you won’t be getting in
ID –the bars might check you’re old enough to drink
Toilet Paper – or make do with the campsite’s own brand of greaseproof paper-style, which is guaranteed to run out
Tissues - "Handy, portable packets, and should stay dryish if it rains" (unlike loo rolls) - Vicky and Nick
Tent - fairly obvious if you’re camping. Unwanted tents and camping equipment can always be left behind and will be given to charities
Sleeping Bag/Airbed/Pillow – the floor is hard and gets cold at night, trust us
Torch – useful for locating the loos once all the Main Stage lights are out
Sun cream – yes, even in the UK
Clothes – especially pants and socks. And make sure you have some clompy boots for those moments when the entire crowd stands on your foot, or you accidentally drive a tent peg into your toe
Cash – Native has spent 2 hours queuing for cash in the midday sun at Download before, and heat exhaustion nearly took us down
Water Container and/or Bucket – for hair washing or general water supplies. Keep any empty water bottles as there are usually free taps on site somewhere.
Alcohol – but don’t try bringing bottles into the Main Arena as they’ll be confiscated
Wellie Boots – Have you seen those pictures of the Glastonbury mud baths?
Waterproofs – a jacket, or even a large bin liner turned into a jacket
Bin Liners – act as jackets, or just use them to put stuff in
Camera - just don’t lose it. Some people prefer to bring single-use ones.
Mobile Phone and Solar Charger – needed for when your hopelessly lost mate calls to say they’re stood by a chip van
Batteries – for your camera
Hayfever Tablets – you’re in a field, for crying out loud
Inhalers/Aspirin/Other Medication – to prevent unnecessary suffering
Hairbrush/Toothbrush/Toothpaste/Shampoo/Conditioner/Shower Gel/Deodorant/Wet Wipes – spending three days camping doesn’t mean you should turn completely savage. "Dry, spray-in shampoo means you won't hog the taps" - Vicky and Nick
Bikini/Trunks – can be worn in the shower or while lounging round your tent in hot weather
Flip Flops - Good for padding around your tent. However "don't wear them when it's muddy, you'll end up losing at least one of them" - Vicky and Nick
Towel – Did ‘Hitchhiker’s Guide…’ teach you anything?
Condoms – you never know
Bottle Opener – or some kind of handy tool which is useful
Ball of String – clothes line, skipping rope, emergency guy rope, emergency shoelaces, super-emergency belt, method of hilariously tying your friend’s ankles to something
Gas Container, Camping Stove, Kettle, Frying Pan/Saucepan – if you want to eat warm food or have a nice cup of tea. Look out for the safe disposable areas for the canisters. Some festivals offer prizes to a lucky few who return theirs safely
Reusable Plates, Mugs and Cutlery – or eat off the floor. Your choice
Porch - As in 'A Tent With A ......' "Mine didn’t cost much, maybe £60 and it’s been worth every penny. It keeps the mud out, as well as providing extra space for friends when it rains - keeping muddy shoes and boots away from clean, dry clothes" - Andi Bembridge
Camping Stool - "Or something to sit on if it's wet, standing up all weekend can be a tad tiring" - Vicky and Nick
Air Bed - "A good nights kip, even if its 3 or 4 hours goes a lot further on a comfy air mattress, making you ready for the long day ahead" - Andi Bembridge
Earplugs - "For if you want to sleep at any point, without being woken by your neighbours/the English National Opera practicing Ride of the Valkyries etc" - Vicky and Nick
Gas Lamp - Not allowed a camp fire? "Although caution is needed when lighting it, advisably outside away from flammable items such as your tent; once lit, it not only creates light for playing cards or whatever, but warmth too" - Andi Bembridge
Dried Foods - "If taking a camping stove, take dried packets of noodles, pasta, cup-a-soup, anything you just need boiling water for - weighs a lot less than tins. Also cereal bars to get you going in the morning, and Capri Sun kept in the tent's porch will cool overnight and make a refreshing breakfast drink" - Vicky and Nick

Camping

If you want to stay at the site, you have to buy a weekend camping ticket. Camping tickets cannot be bought separately from day or weekend tickets. The option to camp will not be available with day tickets.

If your weekend ticket plus camping included coach travel, don’t decide it’s easier to drive there. Often festival tickets are handed out on the coach and you’ll miss out.

Buy a bigger tent than you think you need – remember all your gear has to fit in there as well as the people. (That’s gear as in camping equipment, not anything illegal).

If you want to stay in a campervan, you will have to pay extra for a pass at the time of your booking. For tepees and other unusual stays, buy a normal camping ticket and watch the festival website for details on how to pay for these, where to hire them from and the location of the field. Prices can be quite steep but there’s usually a lot of support in setting up and basic tips.

Arrive early, preferably the day before the festival starts. This gives you a better chance of getting a good spot.

Don’t camp by a hedge; people WILL piss in it.

Don’t camp by a road/path unless you want to be woken up by tens of thousands marching up and down at all hours.

Don’t camp in a dip if rain is expected; your tent will float off.

Don’t camp too close to another tent; your guy ropes will get all in a tangle; also don’t camp too far away as someone else will manage to cram their tent into the smallest gap.

Do not, we repeat do not try and camp next to the Portaloos.

Have the entrance to the tent facing downhill if possible, so anything nasty and wet will run out.

You may like to invest in a miner’s lamp. Although looking faintly ridiculous it means sorting out camping issues in the dark (such as another drunken camper with their face accidentally wedged in your guy ropes) become slightly easier.

You might like to look out for a landmark or a nearby streetlight so you can spot your tent a bit easier.

Make friends with your neighbours. They can guard your tent and you can theirs; you can also swap alcohol and food and have a nice chat. It’s always good to have friends.

Security – a padlock on a tent means a thief can’t get in. However, it also means ‘There’s something in here and no-one’s around… Steal me!’ Thieves will use knives to rip a tent open if no-one’s around, so it’s best to leave locks off. Don’t take anything of extreme value – if you do, carry it with you at all times. Leave nothing expensive in your tent or car. Any valuables can be kept in your sleeping bag overnight.

Camping accessories will be available on site, but prices will be higher than usual. If the worst comes to the worst and your tent is nicked, you can buy another from these stores.

Security, Safety and Health

If you brought a car, make sure it’s locked but keep the glove box empty and open.

Look out for your neighbours and they’ll look out for you. Be sure to make friends with them.

Most campers recommend NOT padlocking your tent as a naughty person is likely to slash it open, believing something expensive is in there. Use the security lockers if you have something very valuable, otherwise keep items on you at all times or simply don’t bring them.

Hide your money in various places on yourself or in your tent. Many people put valuables in their sleeping bag while they sleep.

If anything goes missing, ask at Lost Property or Information a few times.

If you need any assistance, see a festival steward or police officer.

You might like to take sun cream and after-sun lotion, sunglasses, hat, plasters, antihistamine for bug bites, mosquito repellent, ear plugs, hayfever tablets, headache tablets, aspirin, the Pill or morning after pill, condoms, painkillers, paracetamol, and plasters.

If you need specific medication (eg for diabetes) then bring along your usual amount. They can probably look after it in the medical tent for you.

Trained staff will be on hand in the medical tent. In particular, watch out for heat-related and alcohol-related illnesses.

Festivals are cracking down on those throwing bottles at acts or anyone else, with anyone caught often being thrown out straight away. Therefore, don’t.

Don't take anything you're not allowed to, and think about the rules carefully. "A friend of mine got his Marmite confiscated at Glasto '04 because glass is banned" - Vicky and Nick

"Don't start drinking until after you've got your tent up!" - Vicky and Nick

At The Festival

If there’s one particular event you want to go to because of the atmosphere or because it’s your ‘usual’ then keep an eye on the website for pre-sales. Leeds, Reading, Bestival, V and more often put next year’s tickets up for sale at this year’s prices straight after the even finishes. Saves you spending three hours on redial when the line-up is announced and everyone wants one.

Festival organisers advise you use public transport as there is limited parking.

Coach travel isn’t as simple as by train, as many services only arrive on the Thursday and leave on the Monday – no good for day trippers.

If you arrive by train, there are usually police officers to point you in the direction of the site, or just follow the crowds.

You might like to print a map to/from the station off the internet, because if you leave in the early morning there won’t be anyone around to show you the right direction.

The Main Arena generally opens around 11am and the first bands will come on around lunchtime. Smaller tents will open mid-morning.

Invest in a programme (around £10) to find out who is on, what time and where. The programmes also contain a site map, and band times may also be included on a lanyard thing to go around your neck.

If you can’t afford the money for a programme or can’t be bothered carrying the bloody thing around, some official festival websites will have printable information beforehand. Or simply ask another festivalgoer if you can have a quick look at their programme.

Get there early to familiarise yourself with the layout of the site. Take note of exits, toilets, cash points, bars, medical tents, and the important stages and tents.

Don’t carry around all your money in the same place in case you lose your wallet or it gets pinched.

If there’s someone you are absolutely determined to see, arrive early to get to the front. The smaller tents fill up very quickly, and you’ll find that once people get settled into the first few rows by the Main Stage, they most certainly will not move for any reason, unless perhaps they catch fire. (Note: we are not suggesting you set fire to people in your way).

Watch out for heat exhaustion, fatigue and alcohol-related illnesses. Find out beforehand where the medical facilities are.

Observe moshpit etiquette. If someone falls over, you reach out and pick them up, or at least offer your hand. If people look wobbly, put your hand on their back. If you’re falling and grabbing hold of someone, everyone around will try and keep you upright. It might look hopelessly chaotic with people shoving from all angles and crowdsurfers on your head but there’s actually a great sense of community and fun (the exception perhaps being the infamous Slayer moshpits where not only do you get pushed over but kicked in the ribs and/or head).

Security – Festival security seem far better organised than at small venue gigs. If they can see you getting crushed or hassled by the crowd they will rescue you, but you will have to start out again from the side/back and can’t wait at the front.

Food – plenty of burger stalls, chip vans, ice cream sellers, vegetarian options, ‘world cuisine’ (that would be noodles, pizza, crepes and curry then). A main meal won’t come much cheaper than £5, and even a humble burger can fetch upwards of £7. If camping, bring dried stuffs, tins and crunchy food that will keep. If there for a day, just keep an eye on your money or buy a few sandwiches before reaching the site.

We don’t recommend backpacks as when you’re in the crowd crush you literally won’t be able to move your arms and search for your camera. The bag will also keep bashing people in the face. Stick with secure pockets or a small bag slung across your shoulders (but again, it might be tricky reaching into it for items, and it will need zipped compartments to keep things safe).

Try not to get so drunk you can’t remember how to get to your tent, hotel or train station.

Toilets

Luckily things have improved vastly in the last few years. There’s now a nice choice of facilities:

Portaloos – dark, dingy, bit smelly, but lockable. Have been known to be tipped over, to the joy of everyone outside and the misfortune of whoever’s in there. Usually rare though, and nowadays they are bunched together so are unlikely to fall.

Open Pits – not the most appealing, but generally have less queues and are in the fresh air. There are (unlockable) doors so people can see if they’re in use, and are cleaned out frequently. As far as we know, no-one’s fallen in yet, but keep an eye on the loose change in your pockets.

Trailers – These have cubicles with locks, loo roll, mirrors and taps (usually without running water). Can get a bit grimy in the rain, but generally no worse than your average public loos.

She-Pee – now ladies can have a wee while standing up. Loo staff give disposable funnels to those in need and a quick lesson in how to use them. There are smaller queues because a lot of ladies are still nervous of the idea. There are also funnels (like the Whiz, meaning some brave girls decide to use the male urinals, but be prepared for some sniggers) and bags which turn liquid into gel (Go Bag).

Hedges – a definite no-no as it’s not great for the environment or anyone nearby.

Girls v Boys – most toilets are segregated with senoritas one side and senors on the other. Go in the right one or face the wrath of security. Native has been to festivals before where there were Portaloos on one side and mass urinals in the middle, which gave all ladies an unpleasant surprise on their way in and embarrassed all men a bit.

Make sure you have loo roll or tissues on you.

Individual Festival Tips –

Day trippers at Reading - don’t race to get the last train and miss the last set of the night. On Friday and Saturday, the Cabaret and Cinema Tents are open until the early hours (like about 3am or 4am) and there are plenty of people waiting there. There’s also the Silent Disco, but make sure you have a map otherwise you’ll never find where it is. Trains start running again at about 4.30am the next morning, although watch out for reduced timetables on Sunday mornings. And there is a campsite next to the main path leading to/from the site, so if really desperate you could try and make friends there. - Suzy Sims

The second barrier appeared at Reading in 2006. This was designed to reduce the crush at the front. Unfortunately it seemed to be too upfield to stop any crowd surges. It also meant that people couldn’t get through the crowd from the back and everyone was pushing from the side. Get a good spot early but don’t expect to push your way to the front – when it gets busy, the crowd literally can’t make room for anyone else. - Suzy Sims

The Isle of Wight's Bestival is probably more famous for the fancy dress parades than anything else. Take a look at the website beforehand to see if there’s a theme and look at pictures to see how much effort the best dressers make. The Bestival holds the world record for the largest number in fancy dress (10,000 in 2005). In 2006, the proposed theme was clowns – but too many people were terrified and it was called off. - Suzy Sims

Music festivals are the gathering of the masses that are united by music. Unfortunately, festivals can also be a time for frustration and pain, whether it’s a falling out with a loved one or a killer hangover. At Reading Festival 2003, having passed out within an hour of setting up my tent, I regained consciousness around 1pm to experience both. The weekend was starting to look bleak, and it was only Thursday. That was the weekend when I discovered festivals weren’t just about the bands. On the Saturday, my friends invited me along to the comedy tent and a few hours later, I left feeling high.

The same dosage also works a treat for hangovers, as you’re sat down in the shade being entertained by some of the best stand up comics on the circuit. The same could be said for Glastonbury – somehow I spent an entire day alone in the cabaret field and had the best time. So next time you’re at a festival with a comedy or cabaret tent, having been cooked at six in the morning by the summer sun with the worst headache ever known to man, or woman, go check out what’s on. It may just help sort you out. - Andi Bembridge

It's a looooong walk from the car parks to the Glastonbury site. Try to pack light. - Vicky and Nick

Glastonbury 2007 - pre-register or you can't buy a ticket! You can register online throughout February, pick up a postal form from Millets, or download one off the main festival website. Tickets are on sale on April 1st, but if you miss out then any cancelled/duplicate/failed transactions will go on resale from April 15th. - Vicky and Nick

Festival Stories –

Isle of Wight 05. I was stood in the crowd watching Travis, but was distracted by the man standing a few places away from me. He’d borrowed someone’s mobile and was yelling into it: “No, I didn’t lose my phone, I swapped it. Yeah, I swapped it… for a pair of head boppers. I can’t believe I was so stupid!” Bad luck mate. - Suzy Sims

Reading 06. It was around 3.45am and I was walking along the main path to leave the site when two policemen strode past me, frogmarching a man. Various campers were shouting “It’s only the first night, let him off,” and for a second I thought maybe the officers would. Then the guy protested: “I don’t steal from tents. I’m not a thief, I’m a drug dealer. Stealing is below me.” Nice try... - Suzy Sims

A word of warning - the person who says "There's no rain forecast. Let's leave the wellies in the car," has automatically volunteered to fetch them when it chucks it down... - Vicky and Nick